People say i am averse to love, my friends are sick and tired of my over exposed singular status, nostly when with their respective girlfriends, spouses/ fiancees ..Some even question my sexual orientation. Why is it this difficult for some body to realise that a person can be happy of his single hood. Even my parents are a bit intrigued with my so called happiness as the seeds of my marriage have slowly started germinating in their heads.
The true fact is just because a person is single , it does not mean he is averse to love as much as the fact that not nessecarily a single man will always seek love..
The fact i am not seeking love, does not logically mean i am averse to it.
I have heard the cliche a godzillion number of times now, that the perfect match is waiting right at the next corner but you fail to see her.
I am so tired of it now.. i have made the perfect match criteria so difficult
.. that no body can ever say that again..its not easy to find a tall dusky curly haired intellectual bong girl any way..(technical barriers to find the match)
the other day an friend of mine. she came up to me and said, every body has a perfect match, u just need to find him or her.. yes right.. the world has a population of around 100 billion.. so the probability of finding her is 1 in 100 billion i said.. dont you think i have better things to do than running after such a probability.
Few days back, when i was in delhi, i use to cross the national adoption center everyday en route office.
One day i walked in, just to find that being a single father, i night have to wait a donkeys year to be eligible for adoption.
Why cant a single Man be a good father i Ask??
Why is everybody and the world at large conspiring to get me hitched??
On the hind side
The question i ask to myself.. am i really averse to love?? am i running away from it, has some person within me died , have i forgotten to emote? why am i setting such high standards for myself..am i an escapist, who is scared of the ghosts of the past?.. what if the all the cliches did com true... what if i have already overlooked people i have should not..should i make ammends for lost time??
or may be she will meet me at the most unexpected places on earth.. may be i have met her in the most unexpected place..
I have no answers..
but i believe i am happy.. but i dont know my belief is questionable or not.. but its my belief.. and i stand by me.
Yes i would love to get married some day.. i would love to fall in love again.. i would love to share those intimate moments, those romantic dinners, ythose fights which two people share.. and i know i miss them..but still i wait.. for what i dont know.i wait for some thing to happen
What happened to the pro active me...has it not done with its beauty sleep??
Am I averse to love??
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Guys thats what I call A patiala
It was Friday evening, the pentagon had its meeting today in Abhishek and Unmesh's double seater room in the block II of the hostel. Though room was called a double seater, it was big enough for three people and was unlike any other prison cell single seater in the hostel. it was a huge room with old wooden flooring, with the windows facing the barren fields between the hostels and the mess. This allowed the breeze during prolonged monsoon to cool down the atmosphere in the room which was perpetually heated by the argument between the childhood friends roommates.
The sheer size of the room, made the room the perfect meeting place for the Pentagon. Every friday evening Aritra , Arun, Kartik and the roommates met here over cheap whiskey and lemon concentrate, more than a dash of college gossip, and Kartik's never ending flings with a new girlevery week, but mind you, every week he thought he was in love.
Abhishek was that day in his ever so perennial pensive mood, that use to dawn on him during his first year of college. Today it was a fallout between the room mates again, today it was Abhishek's stuff on Udyogs side of the room again.
Fresh out of school, the children in them had not disappeared then yet.
The first member of the pentagon to arrive was Kartik, he was the one to score the whiskey that day.
Abhishek in his grumpy mood had decided not drink that day.
Slowly the gossips increased, with the flow of whiskey, Abhishek in his bed smoking his cigarette slowly feeling out of place, not being drunk. The heavy drinker he was , the whiskey bottle was too enticing for sleep, but he could not drink with the guy he fought that day he thought, and started contemplating in joining the party that was on its peak. No he will not drink he made up his mind for sure. It was then he realised, the bottle was three quarters empty.
And then it happened like lightning, before any body realised what struck them it was over, literally over. Abhishek had jumped from his bed after grabbing his glass from the bedside table, fixed himself to stiff 90ml drinks one after another and gulped it down neat. It was the statement that he made after that he meant after that remained a legend for years to come "Guys that what i call a Patiala"
Patiala was for sure, as sure as the fact that they had ran out of booze, not only that he had smoked the remaining two Wills navy cut thanks to the sudden rush of alcohol in his blood.
Unlike most of the days today the pentagon had a lot of money amongst them, and Abhishek was then the King of the world. At 3am in the morning he agreed to sponser good whiskey and packet of 20s wills for every body.
They had walked a mile to Good Luck cafe to in search of cigarettes.. Butno bootlegged liquor shop nor cigarette shops had kept the door open for them.
It was then Unmesh had the brilliant idea of picking up half smoked fags from the road and smoking them. At the hight of drunkeness that was the best possible option for everyone. With thousands of rupees in their wallets they had to scavenge for smokes, and beg for alcohol
near the military barracks, but did not have any luck with the whiskey the patiala had left the others not high and dry. That day a half smoked classic on the road was a goldmine to them.
As the defination goes.. Money is what money does , that day they were just paper.
The sheer size of the room, made the room the perfect meeting place for the Pentagon. Every friday evening Aritra , Arun, Kartik and the roommates met here over cheap whiskey and lemon concentrate, more than a dash of college gossip, and Kartik's never ending flings with a new girlevery week, but mind you, every week he thought he was in love.
Abhishek was that day in his ever so perennial pensive mood, that use to dawn on him during his first year of college. Today it was a fallout between the room mates again, today it was Abhishek's stuff on Udyogs side of the room again.
Fresh out of school, the children in them had not disappeared then yet.
The first member of the pentagon to arrive was Kartik, he was the one to score the whiskey that day.
Abhishek in his grumpy mood had decided not drink that day.
Slowly the gossips increased, with the flow of whiskey, Abhishek in his bed smoking his cigarette slowly feeling out of place, not being drunk. The heavy drinker he was , the whiskey bottle was too enticing for sleep, but he could not drink with the guy he fought that day he thought, and started contemplating in joining the party that was on its peak. No he will not drink he made up his mind for sure. It was then he realised, the bottle was three quarters empty.
And then it happened like lightning, before any body realised what struck them it was over, literally over. Abhishek had jumped from his bed after grabbing his glass from the bedside table, fixed himself to stiff 90ml drinks one after another and gulped it down neat. It was the statement that he made after that he meant after that remained a legend for years to come "Guys that what i call a Patiala"
Patiala was for sure, as sure as the fact that they had ran out of booze, not only that he had smoked the remaining two Wills navy cut thanks to the sudden rush of alcohol in his blood.
Unlike most of the days today the pentagon had a lot of money amongst them, and Abhishek was then the King of the world. At 3am in the morning he agreed to sponser good whiskey and packet of 20s wills for every body.
They had walked a mile to Good Luck cafe to in search of cigarettes.. Butno bootlegged liquor shop nor cigarette shops had kept the door open for them.
It was then Unmesh had the brilliant idea of picking up half smoked fags from the road and smoking them. At the hight of drunkeness that was the best possible option for everyone. With thousands of rupees in their wallets they had to scavenge for smokes, and beg for alcohol
near the military barracks, but did not have any luck with the whiskey the patiala had left the others not high and dry. That day a half smoked classic on the road was a goldmine to them.
As the defination goes.. Money is what money does , that day they were just paper.
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